Remembering (Memorials)

I will interview you to hear stories and meanings of the relationships you had with your loved one. I will also listen for what is important to you regarding family traditions, religious traditions, values, and intent. We will create a service that reflects love, loss, the gifts given by your loved one, family, and solemnity.

Thinking about a memorial service can be overwhelming. Having a minister there can take the pressure off, provide you with the wisdom of experience, and create a space that can hold your grief and your memories of your loved one. Each memorial service is unique to the people creating it and the person it is in honor of. We can create one from scratch or use a template or a combination of the two. Typically we will talk together a few days before the service. You will create the order of service based on the service that we create. You will choose how memories will be shared/eulogy. We will meet together 15 minutes before the service to become centered and have some private time. The minister will operate as a "master of ceremonies" throughout the service so that you do not need to think about logistics. The minister will check in with you after the service and leave while you and your family and friends experience the reception. A typical memorial service runs up to 1 hour.

If you would like to work with me on a memorial service I'll need some information from you.

(feel free to e-mail to me, or call me with the info, or provide it at the family meeting that we will have before the service.)

PLEASE review the fee structure (below). Please indicate that you understand the fee structure (or ask to negotiate a different amount.)

1. Primary Contact person

  • a. name
  • b. preferred contact method
  • c. cell phone number (in case of emergency)
  • d any alternate contact people

2. Loved one

  • a. name
  • b. age
  • c. names of survivors and type of relationship (Parents, siblings, children, spouse/partner(s), close friends...)
  • d. any wishes you are aware that your loved one had regarding the memorial

3. Memorial Service

  • a. location, incl. address and phone
  • b. time
  • c. date
  • d. any wishes you have regarding the memorial

4. What are the religious/spiritual views of those who will be attending. is there a term or tradition that needs to be avoided/included such as the poetry of a particular poet, or anything "woo woo", or anything very traditional...

5. Sharing of memories

  • a. Who will want to speak
  • b. Who will want to provide words to be read by someone else (the minister can read written remembrances, especially useful for those who cannot be present in person)
  • c. Will there be an "open mike" period
  • d. If there will be a formal Eulogy, who will write/deliver the eulogy (If the minister is to do this, we MUST meet so that I can learn about your loved one.)

6. Have you chosen additional elements, or hope to include them

  • a. Music?
  • b. Ritual?
  • c. Responsive reading?
  • d. Poetry?
  • e. Silence?
  • f. Slide show (with music)?